little isla two

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in the spirit of marking isla's half birthday, here's a walk down memory lane. irene took these videos in the hospital when isla was hours old. she's so tiny! (well, relatively tiny at ten pounds.) and noah seems so small too, and his voice is so childlike! these videos really mark his growth these past six months as well. he is such a big boy now.

in this video noah identifies his new little sister's body parts.

little isla one

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in this video noah counts his new little sister's toes.

happy half year

isla has been on the outside now for half of a year. what a happy half year! it's impossible to remember what life was like without her. she is a happy, easygoing little girl with the brightest blue eyes, the faintest red hair and great big squishy cheeks, belly and thighs. really, she is a little person all of a sudden. she listens, she jokes, she steals, she yelps, she licks, she laughs, she snuggles, she toots... she is big and strong, still topping the growth charts and doing all the things a person of her size is meant to do. how lucky we are!

this weekend she began to sleep with her brother instead of her parents. what a big change! so far the transition has gone fairly well. she still wakes plenty in the night to nurse, but i just go to her and nurse her in her room, and lay her back down. she and noah don't seem to wake one another very easily, which is a relief. and noah loves having sleepovers every night! he is so sweet to her, and says, "good night, isla," or "it's okay, baby isla" if she cries. it's fun to imagine them giggling together in the dark as they get older.

happy half birthday, little girl!

epiphanies

today the season of epiphany ends and lent begins. the feast of epiphany celebrates the revelation of god becoming incarnate through the baby jesus, and this fact being made known to the world. but we also think of epiphanies as those lightbulb ideas when we realize something that maybe we should have known all along. i've been thinking about what those lightbulbs are for me, and how to take those epiphanies with me through this year's lenten journey.

epiphany #1: i love my family. why don't i always act like i do? why am i often impatient with my children or critical of my husband? why do i want them to be other than they are? this lent i want my love for them to be clear to them every day, and to greatly overshadow my frustrations.

epiphany #2: i have so so much. so much stuff. so much money. so much food. so many people who love and support me. why do i always want more? why do i read catalogs? browse craigslist? compare myself and my life to others? this lent i want to minimize the input that makes me feel lustful, and minimize my role in a consumerist society. i want to buy less and want less. i want to share. i want to surround myself with words, images and people who affirm my real beliefs--that i have an abundance.

epiphany #3: blogs aren't always what they seem. i love having this blog as a medium to process and chronicle our lives, and as a way to share our little world with you, our dear friends and family. but it's also a strange thing to write honestly and with humility for a sort-of faceless readership. it's easy for me to share the best parts of my family, of my words and images. but how does that make you feel? i know that we all have this general understanding of how blogs work, that they are just a window and not the whole story, that it's okay to share beauty and inspiration, to toot our own horns a bit... but still, how does that make you feel?

i'm realizing that i often come away from the computer feeling pretty down, after i've spent some time scanning blogs belonging to people whose lives seem so much better than mine. in these blogs the women are supermamas, nurturing to their many children, creating gorgeous art and craft and food, living in lovely, well-organized, clean homes, reading challenging literature... and while this may not be the whole story, it doesn't really matter. because i come away feeling inadequate, jealous, frustrated, lustful. i do not come away feeling energized and inspired. likely this is more a critique of me than of the blogosphere in general--which means that i have some important work to do within myself in dealing with those bad feelings and nurturing some positive ones. which i don't think i can do very well with a computer on my lap. which is a roundabout way of saying that for this epiphany, my resolution is to keep my computer in a hard-to-reach place, and use it only minimally. i think our whole family will benefit from this.

epiphany #4: i am happy when i am creative. i feel frustrated when i don't have the time or space to be so. this lent i want to begin working on some projects i've thought about for a while, including posting some things on etsy, putting together another zine, documenting my babies in their journals and baby books, making my yard pretty, writing lots of letters and breaking in my new sewing machine. for a long time i've felt like i can't begin being creative until my space is perfectly organized, but if i wait for that, i'll never do anything!

epiphany #5: meditation. i'm not good at extended prayer or meditation. my mind wanders so easily. but i appreciate having a short phrase or prayer to repeat when i find myself with a few minutes of quiet--falling asleep at night, nursing isla, drinking coffee. so i was very excited to receive a postcard this week from my friend dale, who left me with these wise words:

fear not! pray always!

an invitation to a holy lent.

these days

isla spends a lot of her time munching her feet.

aaron recently made this bathroom stool for noah. noah loves it. he spends a lot of time "washing" in the sink now.

aaron installed a pull-down attic ladder a few weeks ago, which got noah very excited about the attic. he says he's going to build a fort up there. i'm not very supportive of this idea.

a fun new activity: eskimo kisses.

two in the tub is pretty fun. isla kick-kick-kicks and splashes noah, and he cracks her up.

her cheeks are something else, aren't they?

noah is no longer afraid of masks. he embraced his animal side with this one recently and actually wore it around town!

more interest in animals: here's my old teddy norman cozy in the wrap. please also note the hawaiian shorts layered over his pants. high fashion.

isla is nearing sitting up on her own. she has two teeth. she has licked avocado, pear and banana (but not swallowed, i don't think). she steals noah's toys when she can reach them. she laughs heartily at her brother.

we caved and acquired another big plastic yard toy. noah loves this car. he named it arthur. and he will spend big chunks of time driving it around the yard or just hanging out in it, parked. he especially loves to tow things with it. and he likes the cargo space for his water bottle.

found

isla in noah's clothes. found when i got up this morning.

a carrot sandwich, found in the kitchen.

a mess. found after i came home from a meeting the other night.

a pie-plate lineup.

cars in a mason jar, found on the tupperware shelf.

cars at lunch.

how not to wear your baby

aaron was so proud of the new wrapping method he invented with the moby. "it doubles as a touque!"

note: do not try this at home.

set-ups

found around the house. i love how the "workers" keep showing up in different ways.

my girl

when isla smiles, all is right with the world. she is (almost always) a very sweet, very calm, bright and happy little girl. she loves her brother a lot, and laughs at him when he's silly. she also tries to munch his nose when he gets close enough.
actually, these days she tries to munch everything: my finger, my shoulder, my cheek, her finger, her toes, her socks, her booties, the straps on the ergo carrier, the straps on her hat, any toy or toy-like item within reach, spoons, paper, books... you name it, she munches it. which i'm pretty sure means she's teething. which i'm pretty sure is the reason we've had a rough little while.since the weekend, isla has not been herself. she's been extra needy and fussy, not nursing well, wanting to be held constantly, sleeping a lot less, and crying a lot. the crying is the hardest thing. i'm just not used to it! we've been spoiled with how sweet and mild she's been so far, and i feel totally undone by her vigorous little cry. i pray that this issue really is a very sensitive girl getting teeth...and not a total and permanent personality change. i know that there are a billion phases we'll go through and that surely this is just one of them, but it's hard to remember that in the moment. i always think, "oh lord, this is how it's going to be now. how will i manage this forever?" this time around, though, it's definitely helpful to be able to look at noah and see a very real example of the fact that nothing lasts forever. and that someday instead of clinging to me, isla will be running off away from me, and i will be calling to her to return.

isla is on the verge of so many things: teeth, eating real food, sitting up, scooting around, going after and getting what she wants...

noah sometimes asks me, "is isla big yet?" he is pretty eager to have a playmate. (though i don't think he's thought this through enough to see the potential threat she'll pose to his train set-ups!)isla started out big and strong, and continues that way. often on her changing table she will maintain a stomach crunch at a 45 degree angle for a minute or more! she doesn't love being on her belly but is able to lift her head really high and even lift her legs off the ground at the same time. (this is boat pose in yoga, i think. noah tried to imitate her and failed.) she arches in attempts to escape the confines of the bumbo seat and prefers to stand up in the exersaucer.

nursing isla has not been a cinch. we have periods of ease and then periods of fits and starts, and i still don't really know why. noah often fell asleep nursing, and isla rarely does. maybe she just has more important things to do. but she is still topping the growth charts, so she must be getting what she needs.

my little redhead is still pretty much bald, but i have high hopes for giving her cute ponytails and braids sometime in the future. as it is, i'm definitely enjoying dressing her. i'm really not making any attempts to tone down the feminine in her clothing. i think she looks lovely in pink and i'm having fun with layered dresses and leg warmers. i can't wait for summertime sundresses and sandals!
isla is my teammate now. she is a very fun little friend. and a great big rosy-cheeked blessing.

funny boy

yesterday as noah and i walked to his room for a diaper change, he hustled in front of me and led the way. "i am not a coach," he said. "i am the engine." and today as he walked in front of me again, he said, "i am thomas and you are clarabelle."
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at naptime today noah was talking to himself for a long time before he fell asleep. when he woke up, i asked him what he'd been talking about for so long. "blah, blah, blah," he said, and we both cracked up.
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tonight at bedtime i sang noah a song we learned at library storytime a long time ago, but i'd forgotten the words a little. the words should be, "rain is falling all around/on the rooftops, on the ground/rain is falling on my nose/on my head, hands, knees and toes." but i said "toes" two times, forgetting "nose." "no, you already said toes!" noah pointed out. and who says he doesn't pay attention?

father and son

a few sundays ago at lake padden. isn't this picture nice?

visitors from the east

nope, not the magi. my sister and our friends andrew and jess were both recently here for visits.

hillary was here for a little under a week, before her spring semester began again at gordon. it was really nice to see her. noah developed a very big crush on aunt hillary, following her around the house and even into the bathroom. (privacy is not a concept he understands.) they read many many books together, sang many songs, played lots with trains and trucks, made vegan cookies, watched a john deere tractor movie, checked out facebook, sent text-messages, primped, etc. noah was very sad to see her go, and also sad that he couldn't ride with her on the cool white bus to the airport. poor boy.

aunt irene was here the day hillary left, and to allay the sadness of hillary's departure, we all took a bus trip of our own to fairhaven and back (about 5 minutes each way). it was a simple but very fun adventure. in fairhaven we hit up the bookstore, the toy store, the bakery and the train station, then took the bus back to downtown and hit up a coffee shop. noah was thrilled. he was especially excited about watching a freight train go by at the station, and playing with the cars, trucks and trains at the toy store. (we were in there for over an hour, and his cheeks were rosy and his forehead sweaty from the intensity with which he was playing. it was very cute!)

here's aunt irene and isla lou at the train station:
then a few days later, we spent some time in vancouver and down here with our dear friends (and noah's godparents) jess and andrew. we went to jess's art show on granville island, (thankfully sans noah in the tiny craft shop).

here's jess with some of her tiny dresses

andrew and noah had tea together and munched puffins

and maryka, jess and i enjoyed some educational reading: entertainment weekly. so much to learn about the world!
now all our visitors are back home in the east, shoveling themselves out of snowstorm after snowstorm. we miss you, hillary, jess and andrew!

my little boy

lately noah asks what things are "about." for example, driving home from grandma and grandpa's house the weekend of the waldorf fair, he said, "what's waldorf school about, mama?" good question.
today i said "hmm..." as i walked around the house looking for something. "what's 'hmm' about, mama?" noah asked.
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recently while noah wasn't napping in his crib at naptime, i was talking on the phone in the kitchen. i hung up, and then heard noah ask from his room, "what was it, mama?" which means, who was on the phone? he said it a few times and i finally went in to set him free and fill him in on all my telephone business. he is so involved! it's hilarious. every time i hang up the phone: "what was it?" "what he/she said?"
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he recently made a train from kitchen chairs, with a laundry basket caboose. he sat up front to drive, and i rode in the caboose. "are you the engineer?" i asked. "yes," he said. "and you are the caboose-neer."
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noah is such a big boy all of a sudden. i can't believe his third birthday is nearly upon us. often aaron and i refer to him as a little boy, and he always corrects us by saying, "not a little boy; only a big boy!" (except in the case of him hiding, in which he says, "mama, mama, say, 'where is my little boy?'")

he suddenly knows how to dress and undress himself (thanks, aunt irene!); he is semi-interested in the potty; he is very excited about the prospect of having a big-boy bed (particularly a bunk bed); he is anxious for isla to grow big so he can play with her; he loves swings and slides; he is very adept with small things and loves to "hitch" cars and trucks to one another; he sings lovely songs; he eats a ton of food; he has officially had his first temper tantrum (over a plastic firetruck at a consignment shop); he understands and upholds deals; he sleeps 11 or 12 hours a night; he loves sending and receiving mail (like his mama); he likes to say prayers (though he varies who he prays to); he loves to read and choose new books at the library; he gets very excited about the new practice of "friday night movie night"...
and is overall a very sweet, very fun and wonderful boy. we are so lucky to be his parents!

learning how to drive a train with daddy at the railway museum

driving a train at the railway museum

excited about the cool scenery and steam train

the homemade train, with laundry basket caboose

aaron and noah made a zocalo (a town square)

the zocalo, up close

at the train station in fairhaven

a basket-hat and two gift bag-shoes

an apple and cheese sailboat snack

noah's banjo medley

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in which noah plays lily's banjo.  he begins with "the wheels on the bus" and smoothly morphs into "down by the bay."  impressive musicianship.  then lily takes over and noah gets distracted.